Николай Владимирович Лакутин - The teacher. A play for 4 people. Comedy

for yourself anyway. What? Are you building badly?

Victor. That's not the point. Construction is time, after all. You need to live somewhere. I filmed it first. And recently, a good offer appeared on the market. Thirty minutes from the city center. It was a sin not to use it. Then I'll build myself the one I want, and I'll sell this one, I'll earn a few more million on the difference.

Sanek. Oh, you rascal! Well, what kind of house do you have there?

Anna. I won't bother you.

Anna goes to change her clothes. Victor sits back down.

Victor. Ah… yes. The house. One hundred and forty squares.

Sanek. I've heard that before. Two floors? Three?

Victor. One.

Sanek. Uh-oh. Even modestly.

Victor. And where do I need two or three floors for one?

Sanek. Wait, wait. So you're not married, are you?

Victor. No.

Sanek. How is it?

Victor. What's the big deal?

Sanek. Well how? You're so accomplished. I thought you got married a long time ago. Maybe even a few times. Kids, that's it.

Victor. Which one is there. I haven't met the one yet.

Sanek. And what about you and the women in general? Are they queuing for a tasty morsel?

Victor. There were girls, of course. I've met, even tried to live. It didn't work out. Then I met again, and again, and again… Then somehow the fervor faded. I must have settled down.

Sanek. Come on?

Victor. Something like that.

Sanek. And what if the fervor has faded?

Victor. Somehow already… I don't know. Either I've been walking around, or I'm disappointed, or my age. Either all at once. Understand… I remember when I was seventeen, I didn't have time to think, I'm ready! Everything is set up, everything works, bursts and roasts. At the age of twenty-five, I had time to think, and only then everything worked, everything was resurrected. And now… There's probably something wrong with my head.

Sanek. Come on, you're writing yourself off early. I have a grandfather I know, he's sixty-four, so he also torments his grandmother. And sometimes even the neighbor's, if the rumors are true.

Victor. God be with him and his grandfather. No, it's not that tragic for me, don't think about it, but somehow… Probably, everything just got boring. I no longer want one-time meetings, but a person who gets into my Soul, with whom I want to walk along the same road, in the same direction.

Anna enters. He tries not to interfere, not to get in the way. He does household chores, but from time to time he flashes and involuntarily listens to the conversation.

Sanek. Did you want a lot of love?

Victor. Not necessarily very big, but real. You can see how it is here… Not everyone puts the same thing in the word love. What is love for you?

Sanek. Well, what about it?

Victor. Well, is that it?

Sanek. Well, there… Lyaski — masyaki.

Victor. Yeah… Masyaski. No, my friend, love is not when they look at each other, it's when they look in the same direction!

Sanek. And what, right now you've had a walk, give you anything at all, even the scariest, the most in general, but the main thing is to look in the same direction with you?

Victor. I didn't say a word about the appearance.

Sanek. So tell me. Will a scarecrow in love with you and looking at you the same way suit you?

Victor. Unlikely. But I would not like to go to extremes in this matter. I don't need the most beautiful girl on the planet, but I don't think the scariest one is my option either. Something in between, most importantly, adequate. There are a lot of details, and even though you meet them by their clothes, you still draw conclusions based on completely different parameters.

Anna leaves the room, noting Victor's words for herself.

Sanek. Oh, Victor. You've become quite a philosopher. It looks like it's bad.

Victor. Okay, about me. How are you? Got married?

Sanek. Just…

Victor. But what about it?

Sanek. And why?

Sanek makes sure that Anna is not around.

Sanek (a little quieter). I'm fine as it is. There's a girl, there's a car. Mom, God grant you health, not eternal, the hut will be mine. Everything is fine, everything is as it should be.

Victor. M… well…

Sanek. I'm thinking! Everything is fine, I'm not complaining!

Anna returns again, does the housework again, trying not to distract herself too much.

Victor. Okay, thanks for pointing out the menu. I'll take everything into account, I'll take everything. When, where and at what time — we will discuss everything in the group in WhatsApp, we will connect it. Let's decide.

Victor gets up from his seat again. His phone rings. He picks up the phone.

Victor (to Sanka and Anna). Sorry. (Into the phone). Hello? Hello, Nastya. I'm a little busy right now, it's not very convenient to talk. What happened? Thomas is being naughty. What do I have to do with it? You're a mother. There is a father. Sort it out. You don't know who to complain to… So, who should complain? There is no one. You decide for yourself. Hello? Two don't cry, Lord… Nastya? (To Sanka and Anna). Sorry. (Into the phone). Sis, what are you doing? Yes, it will work out, he's not a fool with you. I know it's the wrong company. Contacted, yes. It's bad, I agree, but remember what companies you and I used to work in? We jumped off in time, and yours will come to its senses. Oh, well, give it here. (Pause). Hello, you idiot. What's up? Is it okay? And your mom says it's not okay. So, what about in more detail?

Victor listens to his nephew's story.

Sanek (to Anna, softly). His nephew is a bad boy, as I understand it. It didn't spread much, but it kind of did. Things are not very good there. There is no sweetness. Also a foreigner, a little bit. Although no, it's okay to be a foreigner, but Russified.

Anna (to Sanka, softly). And how old is he?

Sanek (to Anna, softly). Fifteen, I think.

Victor (continuing the conversation on the phone). Oh, Thomas, I don't know what to tell you. It's clear that friends, the situation is clear, but where it all drags you, you see everything yourself.

Anna (to Victor). Can I talk to a guy?

Victor frowns. He doesn't really understand what Anna is going to talk about with his nephew.

Anna (to Victor). Let's see what happens. It won't get any worse. Probably.

Victor (into the phone). Thomas, a friend of mine wants to talk to you here. You don't mind?

Victor is surprised, but gives the phone to Anna.

Anna (into the phone). Hello, hello. (To Victor). What's the boy's name?

Victor. Thomas.

Victor and Sanka look at each other in surprise.

Anna (into the phone). Thomas, my name is Aunt Anya. Please forgive me for intruding into your conversation with Uncle Vitya. He's your uncle, right? Yeah. I got it I just heard out of the corner of my ear that you have some kind of grating with your parents there, right? No, no, you're absolutely right, it's none of my business and it doesn't concern me at all, it's just that maybe I have a suggestion that you might be interested in. (Pause). Hello? Are you still here? What's the offer? Hm… Well, listen. I have a very cool girl living in the next doorway. She's fourteen, but her breasts are already bigger than mine. She's still alone, I can introduce her if you want. Do you want to? Great. Not a question. Just let's agree that you obey your parents, try to do less stupid things and think more with your head, like now. You've made your own decision now, right? And well done. An adult, serious decision. The right one, in my opinion. It's just that life goes fast enough, you won't have time to look back and you're eighteen! That's it! My own life. It will be too late to rebuild. You need to become an --">